My new hero.
Aside from my reccurring nightmares in which the planet’s sole language consists of one word, “phelps,” I didn’t think I was Olympicsed out. But as I sit down to write this blog two days after the closing ceremonies, it already feels like incredibly old news. Still, because I spent the last two weeks watching handball, water polo and discus, I’m going to post it anyway. So here now, my summer Olympics superlatives:
Biggest disappointment: Boxing. Or what I like to call “competitive hugging.” There was a whole channel devoted to boxing, but it sucked. I’ve seen bar fights with better technique. Hell, I’ve participated in bar fights with better technique.
The right hook headlock ear-nibble–one of the more common boxing techniques at this year’s Olympics.
Worst misstep: Lolo Jones, who was a full step in front of the field when she stumbled over the ninth hurdle in the 100-meter hurdles final race. She came in seventh, and sat on her knees just past the finish line for five minutes with a look of disbelief nearing tears. A few minutes later, she gave a charming, smiling, articulate interview—stopping mid-sentence to hug the silver medalist from Australia as she passed. But a few minutes after that, the camera caught her standing in the tunnel by herself, sobbing.
Lolo Jones, after going from first to seventh in a heartbeat.
Worst petition of a referee’s decision: A Cuban tae kwon do competitor was permanently banned from Olympics competition after kicking a referee in the face.
The gold medal for stupidity.
Best joke: From Television Without Pity Olympics coverage, a commentator complained about hearing an infant in the crowd during gymnastics competition; her husband assured her that it was just one of the Chinese competitors.